Yes, I have seen pornography as a result of my inquisitive mind. I have read in magazines and different write-ups that pornography is one problem of the youth. So I decided to know what it was. Some told me it was a blue film. So, I wondered how a movie will be showing just a blue screen and people will be seated watching it. My inquiry took me to Google. Google said it is a video with explicit contents xxx. I was still confused about what explicit was. So I clicked on a link that took me to a site and oh la la, it appeared. At first, I was shocked and confused at what I saw. Previously, I learnt that this is what couples do in the privacy of their rooms without lights talk more of cameras. And here, it is been aired on a website and this people are not even ashamed to show the world their nakedness. It was rated 18. Does it mean that at 18, one can take in all sorts of rubbish? But on a second thought, I asked what could be the reason for this shamelessness? Money came to my mind. Just because of money, a man or a woman will allow him/herself to be violated and reduced to the level of a dog. But a dog is even better.

A dog undergoes training to the extent that it knows when one is in trouble and runs to help. It can save a baby about to drown, it even knows where to defecate and not anywhere in the house, it even takes its plate to the washing sink after eating and so on and so forth. It has transcended its animalistic instincts. But humans will want to reduce themselves to such denigrating and depraved state. For example, a woman in a pornographic video will be made to have three men drill her anus, vagina and mouth at the same time and later, the one who drilled the anus will go to her mouth and she is busy taking in all the rubbish. Disgusting! She will use the money for treatment first and be ready for rectal complications. Let’s not even talk about the men. One will say, they are making their money. I will keep repeating that having money is not a mark of success but the VALUES one has availed humanity. A saying puts it best, “some people are so poor that all they have is money.”

Few days ago, Nigerian webspace was agog with the news that Femi Otedola bought his three daughters, three Ferraris. First, do you know that MRI scan machine is about one or two in the whole of Nigeria. 85 million naira would have done something better in saving lives. But here we are dying like fowls. Well, it’s his money, one will say. But think of this. What is Otedola’s line of business? Oil mogul. He has an oil well or he is the owner of Forte oil. Ok. Now, this is our natural reserve but because the government cannot handle anything in Nigeria, they privatise it. We are complaining of hike in fuel prize, right? And Otedola is happy. He buys cars with our money. We clap for him. Ok oo.

Back to my story, there are three groups of people in the pornography business: the actors, the producers and the buyers/watchers. First, the actors, they are made to lose their self worth and dignity. They are subject to the producers’ fantasy. They are made to do all sort of depraved things, swallowing ejaculation fluids from unknown persons, just because they will get their pay. They get exhausted and feel used but they use the money paid them to douse their conscience and pain. They even go ahead and call themselves “porn stars”, people who have no dignity left. Will they get elected into public offices? Will they head any serious organisation? Will they be part of decision making in the society? How will they feel walking on the road since they have their nude pictures on different magazines? Probably, they think it’s a closed site. Adult site as it is called. Upi…Prostitutes even attach some dignity to themselves. Out of being unemployed, many of them venture into such debased and depraved line of work which they do in places faraway from where they are known. And how will the so called porn stars feel when they get old, seeing their various nude photos and videos scattered over the webspace available to any at a click? Frankly speaking, they need help. They need to regain their sanity and dignity.

When humans train themselves like the dog gets trained, they can achieve great things. Have you seen the Himalayan monks who subdue the flesh such that they can travel out of their minds, levitate, stay under water for up to one hour without breathing? Have you seen people who train themselves such that they can paint an image that keeps you wondering whether it was printed, people who learnt 15 languages, people who solved world strongest puzzles, people who have the flesh under control? There was a lecturer who came into a class of religion studies and recited the whole gospel of Mark from his head. Do you know the amount of time these people put in, just like the dog? Knowledge of sex naturally comes to one, no one pays to learn it. So what extra thing have porn stars added to themselves? Nothing.

The buyers/watchers are the second in this ladder of craziness. Sexual urge is a momentary phase in the life of man which comes and goes. When one is not engaged in a serious work or has not mastered self control, one is likely to act out the urge. But in a matter of seconds, it is over and the whole system returns to normalcy. If the buyers/watchers have not understood this natural phenomenon on them, the producers will keep exploiting them to spend their hard earned money just for a momentary pleasure which is always followed by regrets. The producers take from the buyers/watchers and pay some to the actors and collect the rest. They keep multiplying the videos for the buyers/watchers to keep paying without knowing that it’s just same kind of videos being recycled. This is why there are about a million pornographic sites. It’s business.

Lastly, the producers or the ones carrying the cameras are the smartest. They are not known. They simply take money from consumers and pay little to the actors and collect the rest. The actors who received little will keep on availing themselves so as to make more money, which is exactly what the producers want. The producers can even run for public offices, walk on road unknown and unscathed but with money in their bank accounts. Terrible psychopaths.

If you understand this game, you wouldn’t want to be a victim. We are living in a sex saturated or obsessed culture of which America is the lead. Sex has been overhyped to the extent that people now think that if you are not doing it then you don’t belong. For adverts to draw attention, sex insinuating pictures are used. It’s just everywhere that it is now drowning the sound of reason in humans. News like A 44 year old rapes a three month old baby, a young girl raped by father and son to death etc abound. Ask yourself, if sex is all that there is, why do couples divorce after all the sex? It’s because sex is not the end of man’s problem. It’s not what man needs. Why do you think friends easily forget the friends they have had sex with than those they haven’t? They feel disgusted remembering the whole thing.

Warm, caring, non-genital and chaste relationship is what our teens, tweens and young adults need until they either become faithfully married or all through their lives if they would become celibates. This sex-obsessed culture of ours engenders in us, pains and broken hearts, which in turn leave us with a craving for true unconditional love. We may think it’s fun “enjoying” what we should not but in the end, we lack something inwards, something that sex cannot satisfy… seek it and you will find it. If you are still having issues with pornography, this might help you. You need to seek help. Then you need God. Think of all your talents, the great things you will achieve if you explore them. God has so much in stock for you. Leave pleasure to gain the joy that self mastery and discipline bring. Enter into marriage with the right intention because you will not have sex throughout the marriage. There are days you will not feel like. And only then you will understand that a relationship between a man and a woman should transcend sex. Sex comes in to further creation of humans and make you to pour out your love for your partner who loves you same way you do to him/her.

The society should stop the sex-bully. We are being bullied to keep thinking about it whereas there are better and higher things to think of. This post is aimed at debunking pornography and not to show whether the writer enjoyed the videos. It’s indeed appalling. Many young people are into it. But WITH GOD, WE SHALL DO BRAVELY.

©️Valentine Obiagwu




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